


Conversations

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-16
Updated: 2006-07-17
Packaged: 2019-01-19 05:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12404283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: A collection of unconnected vignettes in which people talk. Just talk.





	1. Yes

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

________________________________________________________________________________________________________

This is for mische, because she loves Pride and Prejudice and makes me happy. ^^,  
________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

 

J: Lily…

L: James?J: I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy.

L: Get that stupid grin off your face. You said that after we snogged for the first time.

J: Mm-hmm. But I feel better right now, because you’ve just professed your…

L: …undying love for you, yes. 

J: I’m always happy when I’m with you, you know? It’s amazing.

L: So am I, James. 

J: I’m not threatening you or anything, but if you break up with me, I’ll probably stalk you and murder anyone who gets 15 feet near you.

L: You stalked me even before we became a couple.

J: Mmm…

L: James, why are you sleeping?

J: I’m not sleeping. I’m not. I’m just… I’m not sleeping.

L: You are. You’re tired. Why are you tired? Have you been shagging someone on the sly?

J: No, love, I’m a virgin.

L: Oh, good, then we can deflower each other.

J: Right now?

L: No, not right now. You’re exhausted. You’d probably fall asleep halfway through. It’d be a rubbish first time.

J: Right. Tomorrow, then?

L: James!

J: Okay. Okay. Whenever you’re ready. But do keep in mind, Lily, that I’m in love with you. And I’m not just saying that so you’d shag me.

L: Oh, of course you’re not…

J: …

L: …

J: Lily, you’re falling asleep too.

L: Mmm.

J: Hey, when we wake up, I’m going to ask you to marry me, and you have to say yes. ‘Kay?

L: When?

J: When we wake up.

L: No, when are we getting married?

J: Anytime you want. Maybe tomorrow, or after graduation, or years from now. Whenever you’re ready. I just want to know that you _will_ marry me.

L: I’ll marry you.

J: Good. But you have to say that when I actually ask you.

L: Okay. Ask me now.

J: No.

L: Why not? Don’t you want to marry me?

J: I do. That’s why I’m going to ask you.

L: So ask me now.

J: What about later, when we’re both awake enough to snog afterwards and, perhaps, get carried away by the moment and shag?

L: Ask me _now_ , James.

J: Will you marry me?

L: Yes. A thousand times, yes.

J: You see. How are we going to shag now? I’m about to pass out.

L: We’ll shag later, okay? Now tell me you love me.

J: I love you, Lily. I love, love, love you. Love you with every fiber of my soul, every inch of my being. You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. You have bewitched me.

L: Body and soul?

J: Body and soul.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N: I thought I'd do this for all the dialogues I've written and was too lazy to add anything else to. :)   



	2. Chocolate

________________________________________________________________________________________________________   


R: Want some?

H: No, thanks. I’ve already had two chocolate frogs today.

R: So?

H: Unlike you, Ron, I don’t overindulge in chocolate.

R: Unlike me? I’m sorry, but I think you mean the whole bloody world. How can you even overindulge in chocolate? That’s an impossibility.

H: When your teeth start rotting, Ron, then you’ll know you overindulge on chocolate. A lot.

R: Hermione, nobody cares about overindulging on chocolate. They just eat it. Not everyone’s as loony as you are.

H: Yes, people do care about overindulging on chocolate. Pigs like you don’t, but others do. They care about their teeth and their hips.

R: I’m sure glad my parents aren’t dentists. I actually get to enjoy life.

H: What does that mean?

R: It means that it must be awful for you, eating all those sugar-free candies. Why are they even called candies if they’re sugar-free? They’re just rocks.

H: Just because I care about my teeth and my health does not mean that I don’t get to enjoy life.

R: Sure. You just lead a life without chocolate.

H: What’s the big deal, Ron? It’s just chocolate.

R: How can you say that? Chocolate can save lives! It can save you from depression! From weakness!

H: That’s rubbish, Ron.

R: Oh, if only Professor Lupin could hear you.

H: Yes? What about him?

R: What d’you mean ‘what about him?’ Anything that’s got to do with chocolate has got something to do with Professor Lupin.

H: Oh, Ron, please. Just drop it, okay?

R: No, Hermione. Take this. Eat it!

H: Stop it, Ron! I’ve had enough chocolate for today!

R: No! No, you haven’t. Eat it!

H: I don’t want to!

Harry: What are you two doing?

H: Ron’s forcing me to eat something that I don’t want to eat.

R: It’s chocolate, Harry! Everyone wants to eat chocolate.

H: Actually, Ron, not everyone. Now if you would please get that slab of fudge out of my line of sight, I would be very grateful.

R: No. The only way you’ll get rid of it is by eating it.

H: No.

R: I can wait, Hermione. I can stay here for weeks.

H: You are a child, Ron.

R: And you are sixteen, not sixty-one. You can afford to eat this chocolate without having to worry about anything.

H: I don’t have to be worried about something just to keep myself from eating that chocolate. I simply don’t want to eat, so I won’t.

R: I can see your parents have trained you well.

Harry: Hermione, why don’t you just eat it? Get it over with.

H: Harry, if Ron can choose to be a child, then I can choose to be stubborn.

R: You don’t have to choose, Hermione. You’re stubborn even without trying.

H: I’m not eating that.

R: People say chocolate keeps you young. It’s good for when you’re in love.

H: Who says I’m in love?

R: Nobody. I was just saying that chocolate’s good for that.

H: Well then, since I’m not in love, I think I’ll skip on the chocolate.

R: Chocolate can make you fall in love, too. Don’t you want to fall in love?

H: Ron, is there a point to any of this?

R: Hey, I was just asking. No need to get touchy, you stone-hearted witch.

H: Ronald!

R: Stop calling me Ronald! Merlin, it’s so annoying.

H: You know what else is annoying? You shoving chocolate at me.

R: Can you just eat the damn thing, Hermione?

H: No, and don’t swear.

R: I can swear if I want to. I am seventeen and I am the master of my actions. I can bug you with this chocolate as much as I bloody want.

H: I don’t want it, Ron!

R: Do you think I care that you don’t?

H: I thought you would, but I guess you just don’t care about me at all, do you?

R: Hey! I do care about you!

H: You’re terrible at showing it, trying to force me into doing something I don’t want to do.

R: No…I…Hey! Stop trying to make me guilty, you conniving—

H: I don’t want the chocolate, Ron! You’re really starting to irritate me!

R: I’ll go away if you tell me to fuck off.

H: No.

R: Tell me to fuck off.

H: No, Ron!

R: Come on! It’s so easy! You only have to say it once, Hermione, and I’ll be gone. Me and my chocolate… gone. Wouldn’t you want that?

H: Ron, please…

R: Either eat this or tell me to fuck off.

H: I am not telling you to fuck off! And I don’t need that chocolate, because I’m already in love!

R: What?

Harry: What?

H: What?

R: You just said you’re in love!

H: Did I?

R: Yes! With who? Who are you in love with?!

H: That’s none of you’re business!

R: You’re such a slag.

H: Oh, how dare you!

Harry: Ron, I don’t think you should—

R: I don’t think you have any business interfering here, Harry.

Harry: Fine, I’m leaving.

H: Look what you’ve done, Ron! You’ve driven Harry away.

R: Who cares? He can take care of himself. Will you stop avoiding my question?

Harry: I’ll come back when you two are done snogging.

H: Harry!

R: Sod off!—Answer the question, Hermione! Who are you in love with?

H: I’ll eat the chocolate if you stop asking questions.

R: No. You can’t eat the chocolate.

H: But you wanted me to!

R: Not anymore. Not until you tell me who you’re in love with.

H: I’m not telling you, Ron!

R: Why not?! Is it Vicky? Or that stupid wanker who asked you out—I don’t even remember his name. Who is it?

H: Ron, please just stop.

R: Who is it?!

H: It’s you, okay?! It’s you! I’m in love with you!

R: Oh.

H: God, you’re so irritating!

R: You love me?

H: Yes!

R: Oh. Oh… well. Here. Take this chocolate. Eat it while I go upstairs and brush my teeth, okay?

H: What for?!

R: Oh, you know what for.

H: Ron, I’m not going to snog you!

R: But you love me! See you in five!

H: Stop laughing, Harry.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N: Harry came back much sooner, I guess. =P 


	3. Valentine's Day

____________________________________________________   


S: Ah, yes. The 13th of February. The caramel-filled chocolates are on sale for half the usual price, the red roses are artificially enlarged and sprayed with bootleg Amortentia for that extra wonderful custom scent, the girls are wearing short skirts to impress in spite of the cold, the lavender-scented candles are lit, the lavender-allergic Remus Lupin is hanky-deficient, and the stone-hearted Severus Snape is dead from displeasure. One of the best days of the year, really. Second only to Christmas and my birthday.

R: That would make it the _third_ best day. Achoo! Couldn’t they have picked abbles instead? What’s so nice about lavender anyway?

P: Hahaha! You just said “abbles.”

R: Oh, shuddup.

S: Get up, James!

J: What for?

S: You’ve gotten Evans a present already?

J: I’m not buying anything for that bitch.

S: What’s all this? All the moping about and calling the love of your life a bitch?

J: Love of my life? Where the hell did you get that?

S: Well, I dunno… you only say that about twice a week. Might be that.

J: …

S: So why don’t you want to give her anything? That’s never happened before. Have you decided to sod the gift-giving and just throw your money at her to make things easier?

J: No. I’m not getting her anything at all. Nothing I do is ever worth anything.

S: Oh, Merlin. Don’t be a woman.

J: I’m not being a woman! I’m just telling you how I really feel!

S: Yes, and that’s being a woman.

J: You asked!

**Later…**

J: Hi.

L: Potter. Have you uncharacteristically chosen not to participate in all the Valentine’s Day reveling?

J: I don’t believe in Valentine’s Day.

L: Oh? Pity.

J: Do you?

L: Yes, actually.

J: Me too.

L: But you just said—

J: Hey, will you excuse me for just a second? I… forgot something. 

L: Uh, sure.

**Later still…**

J: Evans! Hi!

L: Hi… what did you do? Did you run around the entire school or something?

J: Sorry. Let me… let me catch… my breath… for a second.

L: …

J: Okay. I’m okay now.

L: Good.

J: Here. Have some chocolate. And some roses. And… and a pair of earrings. I thought you might like them. It’s your favorite color.

L: Oh. Wow. Thanks. 

J: No problem. Happy Valentine’s Day.

____________________________________________________   



	4. Scared

____________________________________________________ 

J: Oh. Lily, hi.

L: James!

J: Out for a midnight snack as well, eh? Didn’t get caught on your way here?

L: The perks of being a Head.

J: Oh, indeed. Did you just get hungry or have you not slept at all tonight?

L: Haven’t slept. Don’t know why. You?

J: Got hungry. Is there a problem?

L: Not that I know of. I’m just…bothered. 

J: By…?

L: …I don’t really know.

J: Oh, well… I guess it sometimes helps if you eat. Yeah?

L: Haha. It hasn’t helped so far, but thanks for asking.

J: Lily…

L: Yeah? 

J: I’m sorry about what happened tonight during rounds. I’m still not exactly sure what it was I did, but whatever it was, I’m sorry. 

L: Oh. I don’t really know what it was you did either. I’m sorry for snapping at you. I was just… being weird. So don’t worry, you didn’t do anything. I’m probably just PMSing or something.

J: Haha. Well, you seem nice enough right now. Or should I take that as a warning and run as far away as I can?

L: Haha. Actually, it’s not really that time of the month yet. Even though it should have been last week. I could always be pregnant, since I’ve been waiting forever for any sign of red and have neither seen nor felt any. Haha. I’m sorry for sharing that with you. I know you probably have absolutely no desire to hear such things.

J: Oh, no, no! I’m quite enjoying myself actually. Do continue. Don’t leave me hanging. 

L: Haha. 

J: So who’s the baby’s father, eh?

L: Who says there’s a father? How do you know it wasn’t an immaculate conception?

J: Haha. Well, divine or not, I’m sure you’ll be a great mum.

L: Do you really?

J: Yes.

L: Why?

J: Because you’re nice, I guess. Very compassionate and understanding. Also charming. If I were your son, I’d be crazy about you.

L: Haha. You rarely ever here of a son who’s crazy about his mum.

J: Then I must be quite the endangered species, for I love my mum to bits.

L: But are you _crazy_ about her?

J: Absolutely. And she’s crazy about me. The feelings are quite mutual. She’d probably poison any girl I bring home with her fantastic curry. Well… fantastic when it’s not poisoned, I mean.

L: Remind me never to accept any kind of invitation to your house.

J: That won’t be necessary. She’s seen you, and she likes you.

L: What?

J: I pointed you out to her once. Just pointed and said, “There’s Lily Evans.” She’s remembered you ever since. Every time she comes to pick me up at the platform she looks around and asks, “Where is Lily Evans? When are you going to introduce me to her?” She’s nuts. But she does have great taste.

L: My God. That’s… haha. Hey, why would you point me out to your mum?

J: Because I fancied the hell out of you.

L: Oh. Very blunt, I see.

J: Yes, well it’s very late and I’m very tired, and I see no point in pretending like I don’t fancy you since you already know anyway. Sensible, right?

L: Uhm, sure, if you think so.

J: I do think so.

L: …

J: I’m sorry for ruining that conversation. Care for another round?

L: Haha. It’s okay, James. You wear your heart on your sleeve; I admire that. I could never.

J: It’s really very easy. Sometimes you just feel like there’s so much in your chest, that you decide to just put some of the weight on your sleeve.

L: It may seem easy to you, but for others it’s really quite daunting.

J: Nah, you’ll learn how to do it eventually. And it doesn’t have to be all the time, like I do. That’s just stupid. You usually tend to blurt out things you shouldn’t, like me randomly telling you that you have great eyes, or that you’re really beautiful.

L: Haha. Stop that or I’d have to give you a kiss for being sweet. Oh!—Haha.

J: See! Haha. I’m rubbing off on you. You spend enough time with me and you start blurting out careless things as well. But since you said that… 

L: Haha. No, James…

J: Lily, your hair looks really great in the sunlight. It glints just like your eyes do when you laugh at one of my stupid jokes. You didn’t start laughing at anything I said until this year, and I’m just so glad you did because now I could die happy after having seen you smile at me like that. Oh, and your lips. Oh, your lips!

L: Haha! James, stop it!

J: What, you don’t like getting compliments?

L: Not when you’re only doing it because I said I’d kiss you. You’d probably make everything up.

J: Oh, no. Nothing was made up. I never lie to you.

L: Haha. You and your words. No wonder every girl in this school is dying to have you for herself. 

J: Too bad I’ve already reserved myself for somebody else, eh? And what a shame, for it seems she’s the only girl who isn’t _dying_ to have me.

L: Oy. Why do you do that?

J: Do what?

L: Say things like that. You know I know who you’re talking about.

J: Who am I talking about?

L: I’m not going to say it!

J: Who am I talking about, Lily?

L: James, don’t make me say it.

J: Who is it?

L: It’s me! Happy?

J: Conceited.

L: Hey!

J: Haha.

L: So answer my question… why do you do that?

J: Because I want to get a reaction from you.

L: Oh. And you’re not afraid?

J: Afraid of what?

L: Afraid of what I might think? Of scaring me away or something?

J: You forget that I wear my heart on my sleeve. Why, am I scaring you away?

L: No. I’m used to you.

J: Good. It will make our marriage all the smoother.

L: James!

J: Haha! I was just kidding!

L: I know that!

J: Then why are you yelling at me?

L: Because I’m scared!

J: Of what?

L: Of how I feel.

J: I used to be scared too. You’ll get used to it.

L: What do I have to do?

J: I guess accepting it would be necessary. Then… you know… just let it happen. Don’t try to contradict it, like I used to do when you cursed at the very sight of me.

L: Are you enjoying this?

J: That your asking for my help? Yes.

L: No! That I just practically told you…

J: It feels bloody fantastic, Lily, but I can’t really do anything unless you let me, right? So for now I’ll just wait.

L: You’re really amazing.

J: Only because you are. 

L: Stop doing that!

J: What?

L: Making me like you even more.  


J: Oh, Lily. _You_ should stop doing _that_.

L: What?

J: Making me want to kiss you.

L: Haha. No, James, I don’t think I’m going to stop doing that just yet.

____________________________________________________ 


End file.
